What Is My Job Now?

When I'm not trying to escape, I think of escaping into what to do now...

In a thoughtful essay, Thursday Thread: Do Stories Even Matter? Jeannine Ouellette quotes Andrea Gibson below, and that gave me a whole new way to reframe my sorry, my anger, my disgust, my fear—you name it! All the bad feelings.

“I keep asking myself, “What is my job in this moment? What do I specifically have to offer?” It’s empowering to ask those questions because no one’s job will be the same. There were many years of my life that I did not feel I was actively participating in change unless I was in the streets protesting.  As my health worsened, I knew that wasn’t where I would be of most service. Creatively explore where you might be most useful. Throw a What’s My Job party and explore the question with your community. Friends may reflect a specific talent or gift they see in you that you haven’t yet recognized. “

—Andrea Gibson in Post Election Letter To a Friend

I sub “as my health worsened,” with “as I age.” Which means my health will be worsening in varying degrees. Much of that affected by my mental health.

I wonder about different ways to think of my life instead of being trapped and fearful. Truly, the people who won the latest presidential election in these United States CANNOT control how I think.

I think my job is to be present. Which is difficult for me. But I’m here. Now.

What’s my job? To bear witness here.

But for now, we’ve had a beautiful autumn in my neck of the woods.

And one more thing: Irving Berlin wrote this…